2nd Master Cleanse – Days 18 & 21

End-of-Term-Feast_PS_1This was always about the detox, not the weight loss.

This is my 2nd Master Cleanse experience. Eighteen days fasting so far and all going pretty much as expected. I have good days and less good days, but overall it is a similar experience to my first MC: pretty easy with the usual mild detox reactions happening. Hunger is not a problem, although I have definitely felt mildly more hungry than last time. Days eight through to twelve were a little trickier: I was a bit hungry and irritable. Day eleven was a bit funky. I mean wildly angry, ears burning, face red with swear words flying left, right and centre! The anger just rose up out of nowhere. Got into a right little strop I did. Had to leave the house and go for a long calming walk in the freezing cold January drizzle. That calmed me down. Unpleasant really, but all the time I knew it was some horrid toxin leaving me. Better out than in!

I had a great plan to minimise my weight loss during the fast. Adding more maple syrup to the MC drink. Losing weight is the opposite of what I need. It is actually one of the main factors in determining when I stop the fast. I don’t want to lose any weight at all. But this was never about weight loss; this was always about the detox. I start the fast at 66kg. Today I am down at 61.5kg. A drop of 4.5 kg in eighteen days: I am not very happy about that. That plan failed! I am very skinny. But, fuck it, as I just said: this is about the detox and this MC works wonders for me overall. I will regain most or all of the weight after the fast in any case, so I am not worried about that it in the long term. I must say I do not like being so skinny. Reminds me of when I was turbo-sick and my whole world fell apart.

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Master Cleanse: Days 20 – 24

fry-should-i-stay2Day 20.

Fucking eh! 20 days! Twenty days! Imagine that! 20 whole days without food. 20 days fasting. 20 days on lemon juice, maple syrup and cayenne pepper. That’s wild man! Wild! And! And…I’m doing this wildness whilst I’m working in the office. In an office full of arrogant-alpha-male-city-dudes! I am pretty amazed at myself. Having the strength to do this, take all the jip in the office, and still be able to continue. I must admit I am playing it very cool in the office. Very blasé:

“Yeah man, it’s easy. No problem.
“Nope, I’m not hungry at all.
“I am amazed too. Every day is just a normal day.
“The gunk seems to provide all the energy I need.
“Nope I’m not tired either. I have enough energy to go about the day.
“Everythings totally cool man.”

The only thing I don’t tell them is the difficult $hit. And yes there are difficult bits of the day: Today I went to stock-up on organic lemons. I bought 30. I get them from Planet Organic off Tottenham Court road. (Thanks Femka, cool recommendation. Awesome shop. We can do lunch there when I break the fast). Takes 45 minutes round trip including a two stop tube journey during my lunch break. I needed an emergency pit stop in a pub toilet to have a horrible, arse wrenching, stinger of a dump. Stomach cramps lasted 15 minutes. Not much fun, but it passed, as it always passes. And some toxic crud vacated my body which can only be a good thing.

At two o’clock in the morning last night I sat on the bog for 30 minutes.

So yeah, there are odd, uncomfortable moments during the fast. It’s not all easy peasy. But overall…it is easy peasy. Considering I have not eaten solid food, nor had a sold dump for 20 days…I’d say this fast has been a breeze so far. So I’m pushing on. No end in sight yet. I’m enjoying it. I feel like I am well into the detox zone. Old lost and forgotten toxins must be being removed. I am certainly having enough BM’s: 5-10 per day. I do feel better too. Skin feels very smooth today. My burning feet problem is gone. I just realised I have not had a burning feet issue for 10-15 days. That’s why I’m pushing on. It’s easy and it’s working.

Day 20 is done. Bring on day 21!

Day 21.

Passed without incident. Just another day at the office.

Day 22.

Slept badly last night. Woke up at 3.30am and couldn’t get back to sleep. I just lay there in that twilight zone of sleep/non-sleep. Made me tired for the rest of the day. My shoulder hurt too: a liver signal. Liver must be detoxing.

Weight has dropped to 63kg (139pounds) – that’s a loss of just 5kg(11 pounds) in 22 days. Not bad, not bad at all, very happy with that, but…but I am starting to feel skinny. I am conscious and aware of this and I don’t like it. If I lose too much weight I will have to stop the fast. I don’t want or like the office commenting. I don’t want to look like skelator: it reminds me of when I was ultra sick and at my worst.

Day 23.

Awoke with a headache. My second headache of the fast. Waterfalls of water kept the pain at bay, but it was a sheepish morning and afternoon so I took things well easy. By the afternoon headache was gone and things returned to normal. My mate Steven from Switzerland is over to visit and stay the night at SunshineTowers. Good to have a mercury toxic mate around to chat with. He helped dig up my crop of potatoes from my veggie garden. My biggest crop ever! I now have four bags of spuds stored in the garage! Nice!

My wife cooked a Sri Lankan coconut chicken curry for dinner with wild rice and runner beans from the garden: felt like torture smelling the beautiful fresh smells and not being able to eat it. How long will I continue the master cleanse?

Day 24. 8th September 2013

Weighed in at 62kg today. Ummmm. I have lost 6kg(13 pounds) so far. Considering I have not eaten anything for twenty four whole long days…6kg is a very small amount of weight loss. 24 days is a long time to go without food. Three and a half weeks!

When I was ultra sick I lost a lot of weight. I went down to 57kg. Back then I looked proper sick. I looked horrid: skinny, pale, weak, oily and, well just really fucked up.

In contrast to now, after having lost 6kg and down to 62kg, today I actually look healthy. I am obviously thin, but not unhealthily skinny. When I look in the mirror, my face is a normal shape. Sure it is thinner, but I don’t look sick. I have a healthy glow with no saggy or droopy bits. Well, I think so anyways. If I looked like $hit the lads in the office would have made a comment. They would have said something: they are not shy when it comes to taking the piss!

But 62kg is uncomfortably low for me. It is close to the cut off zone. I guess if I get down to 60kg I will seriously consider stopping the fast. Not sure I can handle the office comments. I know its sad: to consider breaking the fast just because of what other people might think/say, but such is life. It is my life and I have to lead it. 60kg may well be the signal to break the fast. We will see. Depends on how I look. How I feel.

The thing is, this fast still has a ways to go. I am detoxing all the time and it’s not stopped. It is not time to stop yet. My tongue remains furry, my mouth chalky. The headache shows crap is exiting my temple. And my BM’s! Oh yeah, I still have loads of crap coming out. Rich, thick and stinky.  No idea where it all comes from, but I still have toxins pouring out of me. The fast is working good.

The thing is, I know it will be difficult to restart another Master Cleanse. I have found this one easy. That means the second MC will be easier…and longer. Longer is difficult for work because I cannot entertain clients. I guess I will do another fast in January. January is acceptable to detox and I will be able to easily do the whole month. That’s the plan anyways.

So for now, I will try my hardest to continue for as long as possible. But when I get to 60kg, just 2kg away, I will have to take a view. My work is giant part of my life and I need to look the part.

BUT…my health takes precedence!!! So maybe I will just say; fuck it! Fuck’em all. This is me and my health and if I look a bit skinny for a couple more weeks…tough $hit. I know when I break the fast and restart eating I will regain all the weight I have lost. Yes, if I lose 6kg in 24 days, I will gain 6kg in 24 days when I restart eating again. All healthy grub, but the weight will return. It always has done on all the many other fasts I have done.

So, as you can see, I am in two minds: shall I stay or shall I go now?
Time will tell, but for today: I will continue.

Oh yeah, I have switched over to the salt water flush in the mornings. I get a better ‘clean through’ than the lax tea with no stomach cramps. I get up 15 minutes earlier @ 545am and that gives me enough time to unload and then get on the train to work. I have done the last 8 days with SWF in the mornings.

That’s all folks!

Master Cleanse – 18 days so far.

925b6a18ed82dc9d2ed584264d2829beDay 12.

It’s the 27th August today and I’m in the zone. The detox zone. Fast is motoring along just fine. First nine days were a breeze. Day 10 kicked off with some serious detoxing with that pounder of a headache. Days 11 and 12 have been fine, but not a breeze. I have passed some kind of detox crossroads and I am detoxing more that the first nine days. I am having a little more hassle now.

Today I needed more MC drink than usual and I started running low whilst at the office. I noticed early and started rationing myself. I didn’t want to run out in the office. I got a shakes a couple of times, bad too. Hand shook like a leaf. It stopped after I drank more drink, but it happened a couple of times. Went to the bank at lunchtime and felt particularly odd and needed to take some deep calming breath to steady myself.

But it’s all manageable. I consider myself a professional when it comes to managing detox side-effects! So no big deal. Just drink tons of water and chill. To be honest with myself, I kinda like the side-effects. Shows that the fast is working and that I’m getting rid of some old crap. First nine days were so easy I wondered if any serious detoxing was gonna happen, so kinda nice to know all the effort is worth it.

My weight has stabilised at 65.5kg (144 pounds). That’s down just 2.5kg (5.5 pounds). I am extremely happy about that. Serious weight loss would make me stop the fast. Looking like skelator is not fun. Getting odd looks and comments from people in the office is, well, is not ideal!!! I have a board meeting Friday and I need to look sharp.

Otherwise I am seriously enjoying and greatly appreciating my superb nose. Clear as a bell. No obstructions, sinus clear and nose breathing is once again the norm. It may sound odd, but it’s real nice to be able to breathe normally again. A significant plus.

Moved up to three minutes for the lax tea to brew. I did have mild stomach cramps, but it was mild and no problem. You will be pleased to learn I am suitably regular; 4-5 per day. Just what you wanted to know! But it is a fast and regularity is very important.

Cayenne pepper moved dose up 100pct and that didn’t work. Stinger! But at 50pct up caused no problems. So that’s 1.5 tbs when I make my big batch in the morning.

In other non-health related news, work on the house is drawing to a close. We been having the downstairs completely renovated for the last four months. We had no TV, no music, no sitting room and no kitchen for 12 weeks. All crammed upstairs in the guest room surround by a million boxes. My music room is finished with freshly painted plastered and painted walls and a new oak floor.

Everything looks stunning, but the mega bonus is the acoustics of the room have changed significantly for the better. My Hi Fi sounds completely different. About 50 times better. I guess that’s because the new floor is better insulated and the speakers can function better. I’m just listening to a Trentemoller CD and that base is booming the funk out me!!! Gosh it sounds wonderful.

Day 14 – 29th August 2013

Must have had 10 BM’s today.
I have not had a solid dump for 14 days.
My BM’s in the morning show that I still have masses of toxins coming out. Thick sludge every day. When will it end?
Keeping regular is not a problem.
Changed cayenne pepper brands and took too much. Stinger. Again.
Lax tea – 3 minutes steeping gives me stomach cramps. 2 minutes is ok.
In the evening I had my first real hunger pangs. Food was on my mind. The smell of the local curry house was intoxicating.
Felt a bit spaced and fluffy headed in the evening too. Did a meditation for 30 minutes and felt even more spaced. That’s why todays blog entry is just a list.
My nose and sinus’s are as clear and clean as a bell: lovely.

Still working. Two of boys in the office are seriously talking about doing it too. They are amateurs and I look forward to their reactions; if they ever actually do it. Each time I go for a dump they are having a sweepstake on how long I’m gonna be gone for. Tossers! LOL, but it’s all light-hearted. Lucky I have a thick skin. I am taking the grief like a man.

Otherwise…that’s two weeks under my belt. Pretty proud of that. It’s a pretty cool achievement. This weekend will be challenging!

Days 15-17

This weekend from Friday through to Sunday I went camping at Ben’s house just outside Poole on the south coast of England in Devon. He is turbo-loaded. Bought himself a mansion in the countryside with 22 acres of land. He keeps cattle. He has fields of barley. He has trees in his garden that must be a hundred years old they are so big. He has an orchard with 30 fruit tress: apples, pears, figs, plums and greengages. He has a large veggie garden. He has an asparagus patch. He has a gardener that tends to it! How the other half live!!

We camped on his front lawn, which is probably one or two acres large. In all there where nine families, all with kids: Ben, Leila, William, Benson, Poppy. Nick, Gill, Lola, Esmee. Andy, Sarah, Alfie. Nobby, Sarah. Jes, Anna, Daisy. Jessy. Lee. Caroline, Neil, Seb…and yes, I forgot some people too: I don’t know all the kids names. I have known this bunch of people most of my life. My friends.

We learn how to played croquet on his football pitch. Awesome game. Extremely competitive indeed! We chatted all day and basked in the sun on the lawn. Ben is in the meat trade and BBQ-ed all weekend with only the best cuts. A feast was had by all…

…except me of course! I was on this Master Cleanse! It is still easy too. No problemo. I mean, no big deal in terms of hunger. Drink the drink enough and you don’t feel hungry at all. But you do need to keep the drink ready at all times otherwise you feel the hunger coming up suddenly. I did sniff the freshly cooked food and enjoyed all the smells, but I did have to wander off when everyone was chowing down. Lovely smells!!!! I miss them. But…totally manageable, mostly.

I forget my lax tea. Ummmm. So I did the saltwater flush in the mornings instead. That worked fine. I have reclaimed full control over my bowels, so holding on a little for the one available toilet was cool. Hairy, but cool.

I had to get up four times a night to pee. That was annoying and cold.

Everyone had a wonderful time. I had a wonderful time too. The fast didn’t stop my enjoyment much, although the meat he BBQ-ed looked and smelt awesome. Ben is rearing veal on his farm. But veal the humane way. No cows force fed milk, locked in boxes unable to move. We all saw his open sheds with the bulls free to run around. They never go out into the fields, but they are in open barns with loads of fresh air. No one in our group really ate much veal before. Veal has a bad reputation over here, but after tasting his happy veal, everyone said they’d buy it and eat it. My wife said it was the best steak she’s had since we ate in the posh Bull Pen restaurant in our village.

Anyways…still fasting on the master cleanse. Everythings cool.

BP @ 1030pm : 143/89 p 54 and 2 minutes later: 136/91 p 51 – what the hell does that mean? I feel totally normal at the moment. That’s high!

Day 18. – 2nd September 2013

Had an annoying day today. Felt hunger pangs a bit. Not real hunger pangs really, more just a bit annoyed and fed up. I am starting to crave food, planning out what I’m gonna eat when I finish. I greatly look forward to going to Jamie’s Italian and eating his vegetarian platter. Yummm! I crave chillies too. I guess that’s all the cayenne pepper I am consuming. A veggie curry would be awesome too. I am gonna eat like a KING when I finish this up. And when I say KING, I mean a very healthy, food aware KING!

But my tongue remains white, day and night, so I will just have to continue as long as I can manage. I am doing this for my health, not for fun, not for a laugh, not to prove I can go 10 or 20 or 30 days. I am doing this for my health, and I need to do it properly. I don’t fast very often, so when I do fast…I should fast as long as I can comfortably handle and not pussy out because I am fed up for a day. My health takes precedence over everything.

I have today actually put a deadline in here: 20 days. That’s a nice round number. Lets see how I feel on day twenty before I break this fast.

Boys in the office are now actually quiet amazed with this adventure. They still take the piss, but they grudgingly admit it’s a pretty impressive feat to fast for 18 days. They are urging me to break the fast with 10 pints of Guinness and a BigMac!

I weighed in at 63.5kg this morning. I have lost 4.5kgs. That’s 10 pounds in 18 days. Not too much. Perfect. Don’t want to lose any weight. If I get down to 60kg I will defo finish the fast. That’s too low. I will look like skelator if I hit 60kg.

I have to admit, fasting for 18 days is pretty hardcore. Didn’t think I could go this long, but then again I didn’t know it would be this easy.

That’s all folks!

Master Cleanse: Day 5 – 10.

Day 5.

If yesterday was a ten out of ten for easiness, day 5 was a nine and a quarter. I had lunch with all the boys on my desk. They all had a three course meal. All I had was a bottle of water and a mint tea. Nice restaurant too. Food looked and smelt amazing. It was no problem, but it was a long-ish lunch and towards the end I needed some of the MC drink. I popped back to the office and did feel lighted headed and odd. Defo need to keep the drink constantly drunk religiously every one and a half hours, otherwise that happens. Oddness cleared up within 15 minutes of drinking the drink.

I also felt a little light headed in the evening, right now as I type this in fact. I guess I need more of the drink. So far I have lost just 2kg (4.4 pounds) which is ideal. This adventure is not about weight loss.

Last night was again annoying. Got up no less than four times to pee. Hummf! Got back to sleep straight away, but did feel on each occasion that a dam was about to burst.

Otherwise an uneventful day. I must say this is considerably easier than I ever thought possible. Imagine that: I have not had any food for 5 whole days and – it’s a chinch! I have juice fasted loads of times before, but fasting was never this easy. The Master Cleanse rocks! Or maybe this is the calm before the storm!!!! LOL.

Day 6.

Nothing out of the ordinary to report today. No storms in sight.

This morning I weighed in at 66kg, still down just 2kg since the start: perfect! I am adding more maple syrup to the drink, this is supposedly the way to reduce weight loss on the fast. If you want more weight loss, just reduce the maple syrup.

Blood pressure unchanged: 131/81 pulse 49

22nd August 2013

Day 7.

Dreamt about food this morning. Dreamt I was about to break the fast with a huge plate of chips. Chips as in French fries to you Yanks! A great big pile a thick fish ‘n’ chip shop chips, steaming and oozing fresh from the frier. A plate of mash potato also turned up too for some unknown reason. Looked great, but I woke up thinking: surely I shouldn’t break the fast with chips? I don’t eat them hardly ever normally! As I groggily came too, I farted, followed through, again, then sat on the throne for 20 minutes. What a wonderful way to start the day! They joys of the Master Cleanse! In fact, I spent a lot of the day on the loo today. I don’t count these things but prolly had ten dumps today. Wonderful eh!

The boys in the office are fascinated with the whole fasting experience and constantly ask how I am doing and what’s going on. They can’t believe I’m finding it so easy, that I can work a normal day, and that I still look like a normal person! One of the guys even looked it up and is considering doing it himself! Wild eh!

I have only done one salt water flush, so I thought I’d do my second this evening when I got back from the office. All went according to plan, but you do have to sit on the bog for an hour afterwards and that’s not compatible with my mornings in the week. So I will reserve them for the weekend and odd occasions like this evening. Lax tea is otherwise doing its job of keep me regular.

My tongue is a lovely furry yellow submarine yellow. That means I got lots of toxins coming out. That’s good! Stanley Burrough’s book says that a clean pink tongue for 24 hours is a good indicator that the job is done and the fast can be stopped. I guess that’s what I’m actually aiming at here. That’s the goal. I don’t get the opportunity to fast very often, nor the balls, so I figure when I do fast, that I should go for as much as I can.

Apart from that – things remain remarkably easy, simple and hassle free. I get no hunger pangs, no cravings, no nothing really. Mostly a completely normal day, apart from the multitude of BM’s.

Day 9.

Nothing to report yesterday on day 8, but today on day 9 I am having my first tricky day. Only mild, but I am getting my first real signs of my detox. This morning I had to go to a Bar Mitzvah at a synagogue. Never been to one of those before, very nice and all, but I couldn’t understand a word and spent two and a half hours listening to grown men sing in Hebrew. Ummm! I was stuck at the back on the pew and there is only so many times I could get up and go get my pre-mixed MC drink. I guess I didn’t drink enough because I defo felt a bit pikey: left shoulder pain and nausea. Lasted into the afternoon too. I had to keep my fluid intake super high when I got home. My mouth and teeth are all furry, white today, and I keep having the beginnings of a headache approaching, but the vast water intake is keeping it at bay.

Overall my most tricky day so far. Tricky as in feeling rough, but I’m still not hungry in the slightest.

I did the salt water flush (SWF) last night after I got home from work last night. It is very effective. Straight through cleaning my guts from the inside-out. I felt drained afterwards and went to bed very early. I did it again this morning. The water coming through is very dark and mysterious, frothy too. I just been doing some research on Curezone.com. The flush will eventually go water-clear as all the crud in me is washed out. Day 9, with and without the SWF, and my BM’s remain dark and murky. I look forward to them clearing. I wonder how long it will take? Day 9 and still full of crap!

I wonder how long I will be fasting for? I will push as long as I can, until my body says no more. The only pressure I have to stop is pressure from work. It’s a big pressure too. Anyways, lets see how long I can go on eh. Think I was will have a detox bath tonight with Epsom salts. Looked that up and seems to be acceptable on the MC.

Weight: 65kg. down 3 kgs (6.6 pounds)
My pee has gone water-white and clear now. No yellowy colour.
The skin on my face is a bit rough and dry.
Rash on my foot continues to reduce, but not gone yet.
Burning feet horribleness has massive reduced. Not gone, but mostly. That is rock n roll cool!
Energy levels the same. Not enough to exercise.

190052-day-10-liveDay 10.

Boom! A major milestone hit! 10 BIG days on the Master Cleanse. Nice! This equals my longest fast record! Cool eh! Very happy with myself indeed. Gave myself a large pat on the back for a good job done. Today was an interesting one too: good things and bad things.

First the good: Today my sense of smell returned big-time. I been smelling all those great smells wafting by all day. The take-away curry shop. Plants in the garden smell amazing. The carrots. The apples. The curry plant is sooo strong. Bad smells too, like stinky breath. Yikeees! Please brush your teeth dude!

Anyways, I shaved in the afternoon today because I’m going out tonight for the Bar Mitzvah bash tonight. Proper party with dinner, music, dancing and whatnot. When you get to the grand old age of 44, one of the things I have to do is trim my nose hairs. I have an electric nose trimmer. Awesome little gadget. Battery powered for my convenience!

So there I was, just finished shaving and I lent in to trim the old snozzle and I couldn’t believe my eyes. There were two massive caves tunnelling into my face via my nostrils. What? I could see right up my noze. And I mean right up there. Never been able to do that before. All the skin up my nose was like new: all fresh, and pink, and clear. I guess it must have been permanently inflamed. And now, it was all reduced, and I could almost see my BRAIN. I looked! I couldn’t, but it was like looking up a dark tunnel into my head. Odd eh! And pretty damn cool. I can breathe properly today. Feels great. Nice clean, clear in-breaths via my nose. Wonderful eh!

And when I can breathe great, big deep in-breaths – That’s a great big yoga starting signal!!!! And restarting my yoga is very high on my priority list. Very high indeed. That would be super cool!

Next. The bad things: In the afternoon signs of detox started coming on strong. I didn’t have a BM in the afternoon and I could tell that wasn’t great. I was battling with the water. I was pouring it down my neck as fast as I could, but I could tell I was losing the battle. Headache was coming on. And then I had to go party. The Bar Mitzvah.

Cool party too. Met some really nice people, had a good chat, played 21 at one of the betting tables for an hour or so. At dinner I didn’t eat the food and, somehow, the incredibly polite people I was sitting with didn’t press me about why I didn’t touch a bean. I didn’t have to admit to being on a maga fast. Good. Everything was mostly under control, headache was no big deal. I’m a professional and I can handle it.

But then the music started. Pounding trance reverberated through my poor fasting body. I even hit the dance floor for half an hour and chopped up some cool shapes. Nice! However the large volumes of water were not enough to keep the detox symptoms at bay and I had nowhere to hide, and no way to escape. This was my wife and daughters friends and I had to be involved too. I eventually retreated to a quiet corner and played Kingdom Rush II on my iphone, but the damage was done.

What I really needed to do was have a dump: get the toxins out so they wouldn’t circulate around my body making me feel like crap. But I was stuck at the party and nothing was coming out my arse. Oh the joys of fasting and partying!

The massive pounding headache actually brought me to tears. Yes, hurt so much I cried. Only a few right. Just a moistening and swift wipe. Man’s tears. Nothing girly. Some really nasty $hit coming outta me to make me do that. I told myself: better out than in. That brought a wry smile, but this was a serious pounder.

Drove home through gritted teeth as every dump along the road echoed around my head. Eventually got in at 1130pm. I made a tactical decision. I figured I needed to get my bowels moving somehow. I didn’t want to wait until the morning to do the salt water flush (SWF), so I got home and did one straight up. It made for a late night, and I had work in the morning, but I needed to get toxins out of me ASAP. Not sure if this is acceptable under the rules, but it needed doing and that’s what I did.

Drink and then hit the bog after 15 minutes. Takes an hour finish up, but SWF was a success. Didn’t feel great, but the intensity did ease a little. Had a horrible nights sleep. I crawled outta bed five times to pee burning piss outta my poor old knob, all with a pounding headache.

Woke in the morning day 11 still with the groggy headache. Did another SWF and … and good news: life returned to normal. Headache retreated. Phew! Success! Thank you SWF. Good job! I will remember that trick for next time.

Oh, damn, wrote too much tonight; too long! Man, I do ramble on sometimes: sorry, but this account is mostly for me. If you got this far, congrats!

Anyways…I’m pushing on. Day 10 was the first hurdle. I will continue as far and as long as possible. The only pressure to stop is from work – and I have decided that my health takes precedence over work on this occasion.
I have decided.
That’s final.
End of.
No more.
My Health.
Takes Precedence.



Master Cleanse – Day 1.

{DE015914-262B-40A7-AB34-205FFB5C8776}Img100Day one of the Master Cleanse and I go into this all pumped up. Really excited. I’m gonna go for it! Really try and last for as long as my body can handle. There is something exhilarating about grand adventures like this. Makes me feel like Tom Sawyer or Huckleberry Finn. Not eating for 10 days! Not eating for 20 days! That’s just awesome. Will I have the mental strength to tough it out, or am I a pussy? I do so like a tough challenge.

In fact, this is not that tough compared to what some people do. My cousin Anthony, he is the real hardcore. He is a runner. He runs for fun. He just completed a 100 mile run. 100 miles. In one go! That’s almost four marathons in one run, without stopping. Yes, four! That’s what I call hardcore. And massive respect to him: he beat the course record by over an hour. He ran 100 miles in 16 hours…and lived to tell the tale! That’s hardcore. Fasting for a few weeks is a walk in the park compared to running for 16 hours. Respect mate.

I have two main concerns about fasting:

1) Losing too much weight. I don’t want to lose ANY weight at all. I can handle losing a little, because I know I will put it all back on afterwards, but I’m thin and this detox is NOT about losing weight, its about detoxing crap out of my temple!

2) Work. The office. I guess this is the most difficult thing for me: my clients and colleagues. Peer pressure. Fasting is not considered normal in the land of the Muggles. Normal people freak about fasting. Can’t get their head around it at all. And fasting for a long time, minimum 10 days, I cannot hide that from the office. It’s just too long. People notice. But on this occasion I just don’t care, will not care, sod’em! This time, today, now, I need to do this hardcore detox: so I’m doing it. It’s only a couple of weeks. I have loads of fasting experience, but I’ve always hid it previously, not told anyone. But this time, because I’m going to try and break my 10 day record, I told everyone in advance. Had a ‘last supper’ with the boys and made a big deal out of my last meal. Even had a few beers! NOT an ideal way to build up to the fast!!!! But it really was only a ‘few beers’; just a couple pints.

Anyways, Day 1, I have started and the first day was ‘OK’. The only thing I am now drinking is a concoction made of organic lemons, organic maple syrup and cayenne pepper. No other food can pass my lips. I am allowed the occasional herbal tea and as much water as I can handle, but otherwise that’s it: lemons, maple syrup and pepper. This apparently supplies my body with all its energy needs. Odd eh! I read that I will not get hungry and that when I feel a little hungry to just drink the drink and I will be fine. I also to  lax tea at bedtime and first thing in the morning to keep me regular.

Instructions are to drink between 6 and 12 glasses of the drink spread throughout the day. On the first day I drank 22 tablespoons of lemon juice from 5.5 lemons. I also drank 24 tablespoons of maple syrup!!! Gulp, that’s a lot of maple syrup! And about 1 heaped teaspoon of cayenne pepper. That all works out to be 11 glasses of the drink, so I am within the limits.

First morning the lax tea did a job on me: I had stomach cramps and sat on the bog for a couple of hours. No big deal: $hit happens and it passed soon enough. Otherwise the day was all rather uneventful. I was not hungry at all. The drink did as advertised and there was no hunger. It did feel like I drank a lot of the drink. I had to drink every 1 to 1.5 hours. But really, I have nothing exciting to report. I drank about four litres of water in one day. That is on top of all the lemonade drinks. My tongue has gone a little furry…which is normal when fasting. In fact, the tongue is going to by my signal of success. I will try to keep fasting until my tongue goes pink and has no furry blanket on it. That’s the ideal scenario. Honestly I don’t think I will be able to go until the tongue is clean. Why? Because I guess it will take a long time to de-gunk me, and not sure I have the power to fast for a LONG time. People do this cleanse for a LONG time. 30 days. 30 days. 40 days. Holy cow! I can’t imagine fasting for such a long time. But, I will take one day at a time…just go for it and see what happens.

It is interesting to note I had no major detox hardships on the first day, (except the $hits because of the lax tea: but it was small fry). No headaches. No tiredness. No rashes. No dizziness. No fluffy heads. No nothing. That makes a pleasant change for my normal detoxing experiences! Let’s hope the rest of the fast is as straight forward as day 1. Also interesting and happy to note I did not lose any weight the first day: On the morning of day two I weighed in at the same 68kg (150lbs). Perfect!

That’s all folks!

Master Cleanse

Master_CleanserTime for a health update and to re-assess my situation. The discovery that my temperature is normal means my thyroid glands are ok. Temps are mostly, but not completely, stable meaning my adrenals are mostly ok. A little bit of adrenal cortex has very much levelled the temps out. But this discovery means that my fatigue is likely NOT caused by thyroid and adrenal problems.

This is a big deal, a big and new understanding. I have been working on the assumption that it’s all ‘about adrenals and thyroids’ since February this year. Now I learn my problems are caused by something else….and I need to figure out what. Hence – time to review my situation with a health check. I have been making lots of notes and observations about my situation. I will now list out all the clues to my ill-health and my current opinions:

How un-healthy am I?

The list below will make out that I have a million things wrong, but the major problem is fatigue, everything else is small fry compared to the constant fatigue. Chelation is impossible with this fatigue. The last few rounds have been technically fine, but have left me even more fatigued and this makes my job in the city incredibly tricky. Remember I am not at home all day caring for myself; I’m in the thick of it in the city, in a busy and hectic business lifestyle.

So I will list out all my hassles and clues to give myself a clear picture: Hopefully with all my hassle laid out in front of me I will be able to see more clearly.

1) Fatigue is the main problem. It is chronic and it will not go away.

2) I have very mild depression. This is directly related to my current health and how I feel in the moment. The more fatigued I am, the more grumpy I get. When I have a good day and am feeling physically fine – I feel mentally great too. So, I just kinda disregard this issue as much as possible because I know it is just a symptom of the fatigue.

3) Lab tests showed high reverse T3 (RT3) problem.

4) Lab tests showed I have low DHEA. Dr Peatfield said I should try supplementing DHEA. Someone else of a forum said not to supplement DHEA. Not sure what to do on this. Needs more research.

4) I have had problems taking B-vits and B12 – they make me more fatigued as I introduce them. Is this a methylation problem? Probably. Is methylation really tricky to understand? Yes!

5) Chelation made the fatigue worse. Why? No idea.

6) Adrenals still slightly out. Cortisol problems. Too little in the mornings, too much in the day. Adrenal cortex is being used to sort this out.

7) I have burning feet. Sole of my left foot gets horribly hot, burning hot. It is mostly mild, and all I have to do is take my shoes off and it goes away, but still, it is annoying.  I also get a rash on my left foot, which I guess comes from the burning foot thing.

8) Blood sugar problem with some hypoglycaemia an issue. Morning snacks are essential but otherwise controlled by diet.

9) Lilido low-ish, although much better since the introduction of the adrenal cortex supplement for my adrenals.

10) When I get the fatigue kicking in, I get this weird grippy hand thing. I grip my hands tight tight. Not sure what it is. Just another symptom.

11) I cannot do any exercise. No gym. No yoga. If I do have a work out, I just get very tired and need a nap/rest. I am also susceptible to injury. I know not to push things, so I don’t work out. I will ‘know’ when I can exercise because my body will tell me by being full of life and energy.

12) I have good days and bad days. There seems to no rhyme or reason to the good or bad days, although if I drink I usually have a bad next day.

13) If I drink booze, even one sip of wine, I sleep real badly and lack of sleep makes the next day full of fatigue. Obviously I am not drinking at the moment.

14) No wheat. I am off wheat. It is not a digestion thing, but it does something odd to by blood pressure and sometimes gives heart palpitations. Not sure why.

15) I eat a lot at each meal. Breakfast, lunch and dinner I eat a full and large plate of food. All good clean organic grub, but it is noticeable that I eat so much food. Why do I take note of this oddity? Well, because I am pretty slim. 6 foot 1 inch tall and all I weigh is 68kg. This must be a signal that I am not absorbing/assimilating my food correctly.

16) I have a furry tongue in the mornings upon waking. A sure signal that I need to detox.

17) I have just discovered I have a vitamin D deficiency. I just got some blood tests in and I’m told my Vit D is VERY LOW and I should supplement D very high. I just came back from holiday in France, weather was sunny, hot and lovely. I gradually got better and better as the days passed, but I got much better once I had my base tan and stopped applying suntan lotion. Felt like the suns rays energised me. Funny eh! I always do better with more sunshine:-) I need to get in some Vit D research because I think this is a biggie for me.

18) Most nights I get up to pee once. No big deal, but it’s not normal.

19) I have mild carpel tunnel syndrome on my left wrist. It is mild and under control, but it gives me a weak right arm and makes yoga postures painful.

20) Ears are fine, but for some odd reason I cannot listen to loud headphone music. Loud music is fine, but just not on headphones. I wonder if fasting will sort this weirdness out?

So in summery, it does not seem to be a thyroid and adrenal thing that is causing the fatigue. Something else must be causing the fatigue. Maybe Methylation issue with B-vits. Certainly a Vit D problem is here. Getting better on holiday is a clear signal that in need more sunshine!! He he!

Once I realised it was not the thyroid causing the fatigue, I started worrying, started being concerned and pissed-off about my situation. I like to know what’s going on. I like to have a plan of action. And here I was not knowing what to do. The fatigue is stopping me chelating and I can’t get long term better without chelation. This $hit has delayed me for over two years now….so that’s why I got to thinking, and that’s why I wrote a load of notes and prepared the above list of all my ailments. When I write things down, it all gets clearer in my mind.

Facts: I am not sure what is causing the fatigue. It is probably Vit D deficiency, but it might be methylation issues, or low DHEA, or high RT3, or it could be something else entirely that I don’t know about. Or it could be a combination of all these things?

What I really need is something that will cover all bases in one fal-swoop.


Anyways, I am a man of action, I hate sitting around doing nothing, hate not knowing what to do, I always need a plan of action, so I have decided to do some fasting. A serious fast this time. The Master Cleanse. As recommended by Stanley Burroughs book, first published in 1976. I have known about this detox for ages, but never really had the balls to try it. It’s pretty hardcore. The diet is lemons, cayenne pepper, maple syrup – and that’s it. No food. No supplements. Minimum 10 days. hardcore! Oh yeah, and you have to drink Lax tea twice a day to keep the bowel moving. Lovely eh!

Some people do liver flushes, and P&B shakes, and parasite cleanses at the same time, but I’m going to keep things simple and stick to the program and simply fast as per the instructions in the book. No modern variations. Seems hardcore enough as it is without adding a load of even more adventurous things into the mix.

The Master Cleanse is supposed to be do-able at the same time as continuing a normal working life. Not sure about that, but I will try to work at the same time. If I get side-effects, so be it, I will take time off work. I have decided this needs doing.

I just spent the last week researching everything, I read over a hundred testimonials about how magically cured everyone has gotten on this fast, and honestly I’m pumped up and ready to roll. I’m all excited and feel like a kid again. I really love a challenge. I love a fight and detoxing myself is always so much fun. I had a tester drink last night to warm myself up, and tasted nice and I wasn’t hungry at all. I had a super-furry-tongue in the morning! Yuck! I expect the first three days to be tricky – that’s normal with all types of fasting. The literature claims the fast will cure everything. Yup everything, every ill. Interesting eh? Well…we’ll find out soon enough!

My previous record is 10 days on a juice fast. How long will I go with this one? What am I aiming for? I want to keep things calm and not have too many deadlines and finishing lines, so I will just go with the flow and try and do at least 10 days. Minimum 10 days is the only goal. I have read that to get fully cleansed one must fast until the tongue is pink and clear of any gunk (for 24 hours). I will try for that, but I think that’s 20-40 days fasting and not sure I can handle that. We will see.

I’m assured the only weight I can lose is fat, waste, toxins and gunk. So hopefully I will not lose too much muscle weight. That is the only worry I have: losing too much weight is an issue because I am already slight, and being a gaunt skeleton in the office is not ideal. Already with this fast I will be unable to entertain clients, because I can’t eat food. Anyways…this needs doing. I have decided. I start on Friday. Wish me well!!

The above list of my hassles is a pre-fast marker. Lets see what the fast can sort out eh!!

I weigh in at 68kg.

I also have a list of motivational goals to keep sharp:

1) Fuck the office! This is more than business, this is my health. My health takes precedence over the office for the next couple of weeks. I don’t fast very often, just once or twice a year, so when I do fast, I should do it properly.

2) see step 1.

That’s all folks!

PS whilst I’m fasting my to-do list will be researching: B-vits, methylation, DHEA, Vit D deficiency….